Personal Coaching #1 – 7 tips for better communication in a real life.

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[dropcap2]W[/dropcap2]e are humans and our main purpose as a social beings is to communicate. You are communicating all the time, even if You don’t say anything. We call it body language. I’m not talking about dry facts in a social behaviors like sitting with hands crossed (“closed position”) means somebody is not interested in chatting with us. It’s just mean he got hands crossed:)

We like people who are interested in the same things like us, got the same passion or hobby. In other words we like similarities. You can research or observe dating couples during their romantic dinner in the restaurant: hands position, body posture, eyes angle. Their body language exactly fit to each other.

Here I can give You 7 great tips for Your better communication skills.

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1. General body posture.

Adjust Your body position to Your conversation partner to reflect his. It does matter is Your friend leaning this or that side, is he/she straight or round-shouldered.

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2. Facial expression.

If You see anger or sadness on Your friend’s face, it’s gonna be hard to chat when You are smiling all the time. Don’t imitate these kind of expressions, but try to mirrorize what You feel and see in this particular moment.

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3. Gestures.

We can say there are two types of people during conversation: “painter” – who is expressing so deep almost like he/she was painting. Second type is totally passive man. Try to express Yourself similar like Your friend.

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4. Voice, the way of speaking.

Make sure to create connection in this area as well, not only in body language. Be careful about loudness, tone and expression of Your comrade’s voice.

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5. Speed of speech.

Some of people can literally “shoot” words like a machine gun. Others do pauses every single word. Try to match the speed of speech.

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6. Repeating words/phrases.

Catch some phrases and words repeating by Your friend. Example: exactly, you know what I mean, know what I’m saying, right?, do You understand?. Repeat them sometimes but do it confidentially.

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7. Intonation.

Make sure to use the same tone of voice like Your interlocutor.

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Try to be very gentle in this kind of communication techniques. There is a thin line and make sure do not clown Your friend’s behaviors. It might be touchy. If You will practice this method, You will get full control over all conversations.

The next step after You got this level of conversation with Your friend is LEADING. After a while You can change posture and this will lead Your friend to do the same. If he/she respond positive then You should LEAD. So this could be a perfect healer for sad or depressed people. If Your friend is sad or depressed You can change the rules by leading him/her to happiness by changing some of 7 things above.

And the last but not least.

Believe me or not most of us forgot how to listen with understanding. During conversation instead listening we are thinking about response or what we gonna ask in the next few minutes. Make sure to research Your behavior: do You mutter to oneself? Are You present? Are You listening? After that Your conversations will improve.

It’s so easy: when someone is talking just listen and wait until they finish and then reply.

I wish You to have fun in social relationships. Try to implement what You’ve read and watch how effective in daily life it could be. Good luck!:)

 

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